This is my second attempt at a post today. My first go was right after work and a trip to the grocery store. I sat at the computer for twenty minutes with glazed eyes and decided I would give it another shot later.
So now is later. I still don’t have a specific subject to write about. My caffeine levels are low. I heard thunder a few minutes ago an mistook it for the guy across the street revving his car engine again. A quick glance out of the window revealed my mistake.
This work week has been a tough one. They all seem to be tough ones recently, but so far this one is at the top of the pile. I don’t have many days where the gear shift falls apart in my hand as I pull into the parking lot. I think the car was trying to protect me in its own way. It was a silent cry of “No! You don’t want to go in there!”
I can’t pinpoint what is exactly so bad about going to work recently. I mean there are busy tough days but that is nothing new. Crazies, shoplifters, and needy customers aren’t stranger than normal either. I am just so tired. It is like every bit of energy is sucked right out as soon as I step through those sliding doors.
I once joked that the black balls on the ceiling, that hide the security cameras, were really orbs that sucked souls and that was how the building was powered because the power rarely goes out. The entire street can be bathed in black but out lights will still be shining bright. How else was that possible unless the store was using the employees as a generator?
I am beginning to wonder if I didn’t accidentally joke about the truth. I just feel so weary. Even when I wake up I feel tired. It takes longer and longer to bounce back on my week off. I used to be out of it on Wednesday and by Thursday I was mostly back to normal. Now it is Sunday or sometimes even Monday. Then I go back to work on Wednesday and it all goes down hill again.
Sigh. It maybe because it has been hard to have a regular life outside of work. I used to be able to spend a couple of hours before work relaxing and spending time with the kids. Lately it takes forever to go to sleep so I don’t get to wake up as early. I am too tired to sleep and more tired afterwards.